A politician may move from one party to another, he/she may mess up and underperform in the 1st term and still get re-elected.
Relationships are sometimes mixed with complications. The person you love most can hurt you badly, and the person you never thought you could live without becomes a sworn enemy, and emotions flying everywhere.
I remember one of the most complex relationships that I had to work on. This couple was on the verge of divorce, and they have lost their friendship, intimacy, trust, commitment, and respect for each other. They barely could have a simple conversation without it turning to war.
One of them had requested that they see a therapist, but it has been constantly brushed off until this particular day when they felt things have to change. Then, they contacted our office, and we scheduled them for a session.
During the first session, I could see that they have lost the emotional connection, the negativity expressed towards each other, the marriage is so strong and the recent unpleasant experiences they had with each other had taken over any other memories they had initially shared.
We diagnosed the relationship with our assessments and the results showed the areas where the marriage had cracks.
These cracks cannot be parched or managed, so we needed to pull down the existing marriage structure and rebuild a new one.
I can sense it wasn’t the news they wanted to hear, but they held unto the window of the possibility of building a brand new marriage and doing what very few people would do- give their partner and marriage another chance
We commenced work immediately. Need not say that it was one of the toughest work I would have to do with any couple, but they kept showing up for each other.
After several sessions of laying the foundational blocks, erecting new rituals of connection, channeling the right path for emotional connection, and review of commitment while embarking on rebuilding trust, this couple has a brand new marriage today.
Don’t get it twisted, there is no happy marriage without the commensurate work and decision to give each other and the relationship another chance. That is just how it works.
If you need to give your marriage or relationship another chance or opportunity, then do it with the guidance and help of a professional.
George & Pelumi (real names withheld) shared many appreciative notes with me about how grateful they are and that investing in their marriage through couple therapy has been the most rewarding investment they have ever made. On the other hand, I told them that I am grateful to them for choosing to give each other another opportunity and allowing us to work with them.
What can be more rewarding for us than seeing lives and relationships transform?
At Talk Space, we keep thanking God for the opportunities to help individuals and their relationships transform.